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180 when the heart beats as fast and wants to speak

when the eyes flutter back and forth from here to there

when thought takes off, and, for the first time, understands

when steady is the night and ready is the mind

90 when doubt begins to form

when the self and everything else meet where the train of thought ends

when we’re short of breath but full of questions

when the lights are out but we still stumble across the dark

50 when it’s about to end

when time takes a hold of the better of you

when the band starts to sing their closing song

when it’s all static, but not electric

0 when everything’s been said and done

when questions are answered and answers are questioned

when the first rays of sunlight feel like sin

when the prose and the poetry are all but there

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"You are who I love. The girl in the pedestal. The fantasy. The make-believe things that are actually true. You are what I love. The depth, the inside jokes. The best friend. You are when I love. A new history’s being started with you. We are the young lovers our older selves will someday reminisce about. You are where I love. Because I’d go anywhere just to be with you. You are why I love. Because before you, I didn’t truly understand what I was looking for. Now that we found each other, you’ve given my past and future meaning."

- The Last
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Mga panahong masarap panghawakan ang kinabukasan subalit ‘di mabitawan ang nakaraan.

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Have you ever had a feeling so indescribable, that should you make a chart of all your previous feelings and stick it to your bedroom wall, your current feeling doesn’t seem to fit any space in the chart?

For no reason at all, tonight, I really feel under the weather and out of my element. I backtrack through the past few hours in a vain effort of trying to determine what could have brought upon me this feeling of hollowness.

It could be the thunderstorm. The erratic weather. The downpour, uncertain and fickle-minded. One moment, as harsh as a storm, the next, as gentle as a trickling stream, and then completely gone without warning. Only to lash out again when you least expect it. Maybe its the blinding lightning flashes and the deafening cracks of thunder that go with the rain. I was never a rain-person. This kind of weather leaves me harboring a certain sense of defeat.

It could be the mix of the new cigarette and the new coffee blend I tried. Turns out you can be as adventurous as you want/can on a Friday night, just not with your caffeine and nicotine fixes. Taking drags of an unfamiliar brand of lights, ordering a 20-oz. cup of coffee, with four shots of espresso, “On the rocks, sir?” “On the rocks. And add these three packets of sugar. That sure looks bitter.” During certain moments tonight, there’s a slowly burning stick of paper and herbs in one hand, a cup of dark-colored liquid in another. A puff, then a sip. Both were smooth and easy. But together, their effect in my system, well I can only speculate.

Or it could be the lack of our correspondence today. When was the last time we waited for six hours before replying to each other? I can’t even remember. For some time, I’d forget about my hanging message to you, knowing that you’ll reply in 30 minutes. Two hours, tops. But today, we both stalled and paused, making me ask myself, have we spread ourselves too thin, too fast? I would admit, at times it felt like we were talking about the same old stuff, your same old oculars during Thursdays, my same old night-outs on Fridays. But that gave us comfort that it’s still the same old you on any given day of the week. And it’s the same old me at any given time of the day.

Maybe it’s the endless cycle I go through. The seeking and finding. The waiting and getting. The wanting and having. The keeping and losing. Maybe it’s this, which then makes me sick of the same old me at any given minute of any given hour, and the same old you on your every text, or the same old people around me at any given moment.

I don’t think looking for the root of this disorienting feeling is healthy, either. It’s just that this feeling is highly unfamiliar. It is beyond the spectrum of my (imaginary) feelings-chart on my bedroom wall. This is not, and this has never been, how I normally feel during Friday nights.

Or maybe, just maybe, this is not just any given Friday night.

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"They were a group of friends unlike anyone else. No, that’s not true. They were just like everyone else. They were young, and hopeful, lucky and sweet!"

- Sophia, MTV’s Underemployed
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Makulimlim n’ong una kitang nasilayan

Panaho’y nagbabadya nang ika’y madatnan

Katahimikang binabasag ng hanging dumaraan

Paglipas ng oras, di natin namalayan


Umaambon na n’ung tayo’y nasa daan

Kapwa saksi sa pagtangis ng kalangitan

Tila walang katapusan na kwentuhan

Humihinang mga boses, lumalakas na ulan


Tayo’y sumilong, bagyo’y tinaguan

At sa ating pagtatago, mga sarili’y natagpuan

Nakahanap ng pansamantalang init ang ating mga katawan

Sa kidlat nagbulag-bulagan, sa kulog nagbingi-bingihan


Tirik na ang araw nang magising kinabukasan

Subalit wala ka na sa aking tabi, kaliwa man o kanan

Aking tinanaw ang ating pinanggalingan

Tuyo na ang kalsadang ating dinaanan.

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EXPLORE. DREAM. DISCOVER.: TOSH Christmas Year 1

awittyurlbelongshere:

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I couldn’t help but wonder, as we passed the cup of fake mojito and the band turned down our song request, just how much and in what way we’ll all change, in five, ten, fifteen or more years.

I’m sure the places will change (the gifts may not), but I hope the people will never leave. I hope…

Well written piece by Tina Sablayan! After reading this, I felt sad, but it’s a happy sad. Or maybe I felt happy but it’s a sad happy. :”>

Source: awittyurlbelongshere
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This is for you, who stayed when it mattered.

I was shivering, but the weather had nothing to do with it.

You had a full schedule, but I was not part of it.

The rain was falling, the sun has set, the halls were half-full, half-empty.

It was quarter to six, the clock directly above us was ticking.

I told you things are going to get messy.

I even apologized.

But you stayed.

And it mattered.

You stayed when it mattered.

For being open to a full disclosure, thank you.

It does fit you, you truly are an angelic devil.

:)

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It looks like @angelicdevil16 is really into her kebab sandwich. (Taken with Instagram)

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Inspiring Usapang Midya episode earlier today with @trish_roque ! <3 (Taken with Instagram)